Tuesday, 18 May 2010

Intriguing, Yet Inescapable Venn Diagram

Statistics show the inevitable outcome of this contest. Only one has BOTH requirements to lead.

PS Damn you McDonnell, DAMN YOU!

UPDATE: Actually, I was misinformed. Hoorays for McDonnell, Raspberries, as per, to the PLP-Project Stitch Up.


Why, this is hell, nor am I out of it.

Do not get out of the boat.

Mark Kermode's verdict deserves a full airing*, as do Laurie Penny and Lindy West's views.

*Particularly the bit where he starts singing The Internationale. No joke.

Tuesday, 11 May 2010

Fucking Lib Dem Wankbastwats

Oh well, at least it's taken the difficulty out of the decision for when the government falls this autumn. Never voting for those fuckers again, even if Nick Brown is the alternative.

Hopefully the same will go for most other core Labour voters who, like me, made an unwise choice.

Fuck. Them.

Politics of the Street*

Overheard whilst doing the paper sale on Saturday:

Daughter: "Who won the election then?"
Mother: "No one."


*Northumberland St to be exact.

Thursday, 6 May 2010


I'm going to vote in a minute, and I still don't know what I'm going to do. I want to vote for someone who isn't a complete twat. Really, I do. But this was the headline in the Torygraph today. So I'm probably going to vote for someone I despise, whose party has disappointed me and, somewhat worse, been responsible for hundreds of thousands, if not millions of deaths, and who have done nothing to reverse the legacy of Thatcher. Because if I don't, and this happens,

What am I supposed to tell whatever little Christies might ever turn up? But equally, it's Nick Brown's fault we've come to this in many ways, so if I vote for him I'm rewarding failure, which New Labour don't believe in. Gordon Brown's always talking about rights and responsibilities, after all.

Which would be fine, if it was them who pay for their errors. But it's not, is it? It's us. Fuck.

I'll just have to toss a coin or something, I think. Jesus. Thank you Labour. I should have been a lifelong voter for you*, but I believe in equality, social justice, internationalism, and not bombing the shit out of brown people and scapegoating foreigners, so somewhere along the line I feel we've parted company.**

*until our glorious proletarian revolution, anyway. At which point you'd all have been shot as collaborators, you reformist motherfuckers.

** Of course, I also felt this way in 2005. My MP wasn't such a nob then though.

Wednesday, 5 May 2010

My empty life, and other fables

I really don't like The Road. It's the epitome of American navel-gazing, the peak of a long hill which offers such notable vistas as Six Feet Under, Heroes, Buffy, and, well, pretty much everything except for Knight Rider*. Most American drama justifies itself on one, flimsy premise**: it's about the emotional journey of the character(s). In other words, it's a one-way trip to Narcissism Village, pop: you, the most specialist person in the wholest worldz. The Road is one such 'journey', only because Cormac McCarthy doesn't want to leave it to chance that the reader might not understand this, he's made it a literal journey as well.

Woo hoo, road trip!

Except not, of course. Because this is a trip through a dying Earth, which has no hope, no life and only fear and the inevitable knowledge of death pressing down upon us. A world in which children are a burden, or a curse, or objects of pity. It's rubbish. It's rubbish because it has to go so far to set up its misery-lit premise that it tells you straight away that its concerns are nothing to do with human experience. It's a cynic's mud bath, sure, but bears no relation to real trauma, with its ocurrence in a complex, dynamic world where torture happens down the road from family dinners. It's the worst kind of navel-gazing 'ooh isn't everything really terrible, when you get right down to it, there's no point doing my homework or anything even 'cos it's all so pointless' teenage bollocks. Grow the fuck up.

Sorry, saw it the other night and it reminded me of how much I hated the book. Anyway, made a change from the election, didn't it?

*At least Buffy killed vampires and had the world's sexiest GBF. Six Feet Under had miserable talking corpses. Jesus, get over yourselves, it's only life for fuck's sake, and you're all missing it!

** [picks almost at random] Oi! The Good Wife! I'm looking at you! No one cares about you or your husband. Or your dangerously perfect kids. The only thing anyone cares about is how Cybil Shepherd's best mate from Cybil is suddenly a high-powered lawyer. Now fuck off.

Tuesday, 4 May 2010

Fuck Me

I've always believed you shouldn't judge by appearances, but do I even have to tell you who this prick is? Jesus.

Sweet Christ I want to stab him in the eyes even before I've seen his politics...

Monday, 3 May 2010

Oh, and Just One More Thing...

Hmm. Indeed.

Nearly 17 years after she was evicted from Downing Street, there is no mistaking Baroness Thatcher's star quality. The former Prime Minister, wearing a striking cerise dress rather than her usual blue, was treated like royalty when she dropped into her old home for tea.

All hostilities were apparently forgotten as the current tenant, who has confessed to admiration for her leadership style, welcomed her with a handshake on the doorstep and ushered her inside.

Gordon Brown escorted his old foe around the rooms she occupied for over a decade, as well as a spin around the garden. He took her into her old study, still known as the Thatcher Room, where they discussed the current political situation for almost an hour. ...

After more than two hours, she emerged clutching a small bouquet of flowers given to her by John Brown. His father, the author of Where There Is Greed: Margaret Thatcher and the Betrayal of Britain's Future in 1989, bowed as she left.

How odd. But then, I'm sure that isn't part of a wider trend...

Lady Thatcher, who played a leading role on the world stage for more than 11 years as Premier, is reported to have advised Mr Blair about the correct approach to international meetings and how to handle world leaders. ...

The two politicians are reported to have mutual admiration for each other's strong leadership styles. Earlier this year, Lady Thatcher reportedly described Mr Blair as "a great patriot" and someone who would not "do Britain down".

Meanwhile Mr Blair has always stressed that he will not reverse the main elements of Lady Thatcher's right-wing revolution, amid signs that he too admires some of her achievements.

Ho hum.

Labour's Last Minute Election Push

Hmm. They're right - Labour hasn't been perfect. I choose to interpret this admission as a sign of strength. You know, similar to this.

But wait, there's something else on the mat. What's this?

Click to enlargerate.

Hmm, good points. As Chief Whip, Nick has had a lot of influence over which bills get through, so maybe I should give this seasoned statesman a chance after all.